


La Raison de Vivre

by Izzu



Category: Korean Drama, 유령 | Ghost
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-27
Updated: 2013-10-28
Packaged: 2017-12-30 15:26:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,270
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1020308
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Izzu/pseuds/Izzu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After the confrontation with Jo Hyeon Min comes to an end, the team was anxious to keep Park Ki Young as part of their team member. Ki Young also wonders if he should continue on to live as Kim Woo Hyun.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> If the title sounds weird, do correct me. And because I wanted to write this scene as part of the story instead of a meta.

The surrounding area quickly getting crowded as the police arrived and curious onlookers stopping by to get a peek of the scene. Ki Young sighed to himself as he watched the officers moving the body, as well as managing the crowds that kept on increasing. And there's the press... they must have caught wind of the identity of the dead.  
  
A few more cars screeched to a halt as moments later Ki Young felt a hand grabbing his arm. He turned around as Team Leader Kwon glared at his face.  
  
"What did you do? Wait... we better have this talk elsewhere..."  
  
xxx  
  
Team Leader Kwon dragged him away from the scene as they were met by the rest of the team. Within moments, he was surrounded by the four people.  
  
"We heard Jo Hyeon Min jumped—"  
  
"Did you do it—?"  
  
"I know that you're angry because he got away, but that doesn't mean—"  
  
"Now, now... slow down everyone!", Team Leader Kwon immediately pulled them apart before turning around towards him. "All right, Park Ki Young. Fess up. What did you do?"  
  
Ki Young shrugged. "I did nothing." he said before looking up at the others. "I went to see him because I can't stand to see him thinking that he's won over us without facing the consequences. After all of the lives that he'd taken, for killing Woo Hyun... I have to end it. One way or another."  
  
Kang Mi's eyes widened. "Don't tell me... you didn't—!"  
  
"I didn't push him down." Ki Young turned his eyes away. "He did that by himself. I just gave him Shin Hyo Jeong's phone."  
  
"If there was anything else that I could have done, it was that. To show Jo Hyeon Min just how far have he gone to the point of no return. To make him realize just how big was his mistake to kill Shin Hyo Jeong. How it was a mistake for him to kill Woo Hyun, and anyone else since then. I want to make him realise the full weight of taking people's lives! That just because you replace the word 'kill' with 'delete', doesn't mean you're exempted from the sin of committing murder."  
  
He sighed.  
  
"The bastard did say that the only person that could convict or punish him was himself. Well, he's right."  
  
Everyone did not try to argue that point as the five of them became silent. Ki Young continued musing in silence before letting out a small sigh. "It's over now... right?"  
  
Ki Young looked up to the sky. "So, should I leave the Cyber Team now? Woo Hyun had wanted to quit after all... once he managed to close this case. So it should be fitting for me to do that as well,"  
  
"No! You can't!" Sang Woo exclaimed immediately. "You have to stay,"  
  
"We've lost too many people already..." said Tae Gyun as well. "Team Leader Kim... Detective Han... Director Jeon, we can't lose any more people from this team!"  
  
Team Leader Kwon pulled him to the side. "Are you really going to pull out that thing you've told me before? That you're going to give yourself up and tell people of your real identity? After we've tried so hard to convince people that you're the real deal?"  
  
"I didn't say that!" Ki Yong snapped as he pulled his arm away. "About that... I don't even think I could even go back to being the real me. Especially... after Jo Hyeon Min fell on that curb. And the fact doing so might also affect Jo Jae Min's case. I wouldn't do that now."  
  
He let out a long breath.  
  
"I just... thought that perhaps it's time now that I stop pretending to be a cop. Since I only borrowed it from Woo Hyun."  
  
"Team Leader Kim..."  
  
Ki Young looked up as he stared blankly towards Kang Mi. For a brief second, he thought he caught her looking at her cellphone. She shrugged.  
  
"Team Leader Kim, would have wanted you to remain... taking his place in the Cyber Team." Her eyes started to swell with tears before she blinked it away. "I know that he would have wanted you to keep his job. He'd tell you to not give up. And continue catching criminals."  
  
Tae Gyun started nodding vigorously as well, though his efforts to hide his tears were less successful. "Yes... yes! Listen to Detective Yoo! I believed that Team Leader Kim would think the same way as well. You can't leave!"  
  
Team Leader Kwon nudged him from the sides. He smiled. "Hear that? Your team needs you. And even if I don't really know Kim Woo Hyun that well, I could tell that he considered you to be important and would have wanted you to remain."  
  
Ki Young stared at everyone's face before turning towards Kwon. "Team Leader..."  
  
The Mad Cow shrugged. "I wanted to believe that he did thought of you like that. As an irreplaceable partner. And I'm going to make sure you're staying in my team. Losing Kim Woo Hyun in that bloody explosion was bad enough, I'm not going to lose you as well!"  
  
Ki Young gave Team Leader Kwon a weak smile before looking back towards Kang Mi. "But... didn't you say before, that after we solve this case you wanted to put Woo Kyun back to his proper place?"  
  
Kang Mi sighed as Tae Gyun and Sang Woo turned to look at her.  
  
She cocked her head. "That can wait. At least we managed to clear Team Leader Kim's name from being thought of as a corrupt cop. At least we know, that he didn't die in dishonour," She fidgeted again with her cellphone as Ki Young noticed again. She heaved a long sigh.  
  
"Even if Team Leader died under your name, there's still us to remember him as who he really was. For now, that's good enough to me."  
  
As she said it, Yoo Kang Mi stared straight at him... full of conviction. Ki Young glanced to each of his other teammates to see that they were also wearing the look that wouldn't accept any negative answers from him. He chuckled.  
  
"Guys... don't look at me like that. And it's already late. Might as well we talk about this tomorrow."  
  
"But there's a lot of good thing if you stayed with the team!" cried Tae Gyun again, refusing to give up. "I mean... on your abilities as Hades, we could use that as our trump cards in the cyber investigations! I don't think it's a bad idea to have a hacker as part of the team... I mean, when Team Leader Kim picked me to be part of the team he said—"  
  
Ki Young placed his hands on Tae Gyun's shoulders as he smiled. "I get it. I'm not going to quit the team... all right?" He turned towards the others. "So can you guys loosen up on me a bit?"  
  
Mad Cow Kwon grinned. "Well... since we cleared that part out. About time we're having that drink!"  
  
"I'll pass..." said Ki Young hastily. "I thought that I should go visit father at the hospital. Now that everything's come to an end, I should at least let him know. And Yoo Kang Mi, if you don't mind... I'd like you to keep Seon Woo company tonight. Since I thought... I want to pay Woo Hyun a visit as well tomorrow."  
  
Kang Mi nodded.  
  
"Very well..."


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Adding my own headcanon on the relationship between Woo Hyun, Ki Young and Kim Seok Joon

He flashed Woo Hyun's identification badge at the officers before entering the room. Even when Jo Hyeon Min now dead, it was still a relief to have the officers standing guard over Woo Hyun's father. Since there wasn't any guarantee that Jo Hyeon Min haven't send anyone to harm  _his family_  prior to their talk.  
  
Ki Young took a chair and sat beside the bed.  _His father's_  condition looked like it's improving... that was a relief.   
  
Ever since he lost his family and taken into the Kim family, Woo Hyun and his father were the only family he had left. But with Woo Hyun gone, he now only have  _his father_ and Seon Woo. He didn't want anything else to happen to either of them. He had enough of losing the people he cared a lot.  
  
While he did consider leaving the force, he didn't plan to leave  _his father_ and Seon Woo. But it seemed... he didn't really have a say on that.  
  
"Father... is it fine for me to remain like this? Everything's over now, we should be able to close the case. But is it right for me to remain in the force as Woo Hyun?" said Ki Young softly, mindful to make sure that he did closed the door when he came in. "Even if... being in the Cyber Team was the best thing that could happen for me."  
  
He sighed. Since they were small, both he and Woo Hyun had keen interest in learning about computers. And since Woo Hyun's father was quite an influential policeman, both of them had aspired to be as great a cop like him. Because of that, a part of him used to be so ashamed of himself to not able to become a policeman... that he refused to show himself any more in front of Woo Hyun. It's not just because of the Sekang slush fund case, he didn't want to face Woo Hyun in case he ended up confiding to him about it.   
  
Woo Hyun had always looked up highly to his father after all...  
  
And also... since he kept re-imagining how things could have turned out, if he had done things differently. How things may end up happening differently, if he made a different choice in his life. If he had allowed Woo Hyun to arrest him at the terminal. If he had let Woo Hyun to do his own investigations. Or if he told Woo Hyun the truth much earlier. If he could set aside his own shame of being reduced to a mere hacker instead of a policeman; and perhaps worked together with Woo Hyun to investigate Safe Tech. Woo Hyun could have still be alive.   
  
He could have been able to witness the many things he missed seeing from Woo Hyun's life. Woo Hyun's marriage, Seon Woo's birth... or how he could have coaxed Woo Hyun to confess his feelings to Kang Mi; he could have been there... still being an essential part in each other's lives.   
  
Since there was never a moment in his life now that he hadn't wished that Woo Hyun was still alive. That his current reflection in the mirror was really the real Woo Hyun. That he didn't have to feel like he continued stealing the life that Woo Hyun could have still lived...  
  
"When it comes to computer knowledge, I was better at it than Woo Hyun. But Woo Hyun had more experiences working as a policeman than me. And Woo Hyun... was better in making deductions and interpreting the criminal's next move. He's more observant as well..."  
  
Ki Young thought about the investigation reports that Woo Hyun have written before Jo Hyeon Min managed to steal them away from him. Back then... Woo Hyun was made to investigate the old case involving the Sekang slush fund incident. And he somehow caught on the Safe Tech's beta version of the vaccine programme. When it took him a much longer time to figure it out. On how Safe Tech have any relation to Jo Hyeon Min's plans.  
  
If Jo Hyeon Min didn't try to recover all of the remaining evidences of the vaccine programme being a hacking programme, he wouldn't have noticed it. If it had been Woo Hyun—even if he had lost his memories of the things he'd done prior to the explosion—Woo Hyun would have investigated Safe Tech much earlier himself. That it was suspicious for Safe Tech to rise rapidly due to the supposed DDoS attacks. Woo Hyun would have investigated the vaccine programme much earlier to find out the reasoning how Safe Tech managed to develop the programme to counter the threats much faster than the other companies.  
  
In that sense, Woo Hyun was much better that him. Compared to him, he wouldn't have thought to try anticipate a criminal's moves—one, two steps ahead.  
  
That was also true with Shin Hyo Jeong's case. Woo Hyun had trusted him way much than he credited him for. Why else would Woo Hyun still investigated the reason why the killer hadn't appear in the CCTV when they were already given the manipulated video showing him as Shin Hyo Jeong's killer? When he gave up in trying to find the explanation, Woo Hyun kept on it to prove that he was innocent—that there should be a reason why the killer could have so easily hide his presence. That should be how he found out that Jo Hyeon Min was the culprit, that Woo Hyun would come to realize that it wouldn't be so simple to try clear him of the suspicions of murder as long as Jo Hyeon Min was involved.  
  
How... he could even compare himself to Woo Hyun?  
  
"Am I able to live up to Woo Hyun's abilities as an officer? Could I be as good as he was?"  
  
The things he had been able to do, he wouldn't be able to compare to what Woo Hyun did. While he had Kang Mi... Team Leader Kwon, Tae Gyun, Sang Woo; Woo Hyun had been doing everything alone. While trying to protect his important team-mates and trying to watch out for the spies he couldn't see; he could not imagine how much courage Woo Hyun would have to muster by himself in order to not falter.  
  
So how could he just take it from Woo Hyun, of all the acknowledgements of the things Woo Hyun had done... acting as the real one?  
  
 _"Woo Hyun... would be glad, to have you continue on in his place."_  
  
Ki Young snapped back from his musing, as he noticed that  _his father_  had woken up. He smiled weakly.  
  
"Father? Sorry to disturb you at this time..." he said as Kim Seok Joon shook his head.  
  
"Woo Hyun... would be happy if you could... continue being a policeman. He always regretted not being able to do anything for you before."  
  
The older Kim sighed. "Woo Hyun's tendencies to do the double amount of work he's doing... was partially because he was a perfectionist as well as not wanting to leave any evidence unchecked. Another reason... because he wanted to compensate for you not being able to become an officer alongside him. Woo Hyun always wished that both of you had been able to work together as policemen."  
  
Ki Young held  _his father's_  hand as he placed it to his cheeks. He always felt close to the older man, just as he would to his own real father. Also it didn't surprise him before at how easily the old man could recognize him for who he really was inside. The man who knew too well how close he had been with Woo Hyun.  
  
"Especially for Seon Woo, I hope you can continue doing Woo Hyun's job in his place. I know... that this was a selfish request from an old man—"  
  
"No, father! Don't say like that, I didn't really mind it..." cried Ki Young as the old man continued.  
  
"Woo Hyun had always raised Seon Woo up to be able to take care of himself in case something happened to him while on duty, but I don't think the child could bear it if he finds out the truth now. It's okay if you want to tell him the truth after Seon Woo is a bit more older..."  
  
Ki Young nodded his head, not wanting to let his father continue one talking. "I'll do that, father. You don't have to worry about that..." he said as he struggled with his own tears. "For now, I'll take care of Seon Woo like he's my own kid."  
  
Since he owed that to Woo Hyun. For not being able protect him, to save him. Because of that, he should've at least take care of Woo Hyun's family.


	3. Chapter 3

_"There's something... I've been meaning to show to you..."_  
  
He didn't know what was it that he was expecting. Certainly not Woo Hyun's last and final message. And even if it was directed to Yoo Kang Mi, for some reason right now... he felt that those words from Woo Hyun were meant for him as well. How ironic, seeing that he had been struggling with many of his own thoughts these days. As if... these last words from Woo Hyun were meant to strengthen his resolve to keep continuing to work as a policemen in the Cyber Investigation Unit.  
  
 ** _A cop cannot give up.  
We have to catch the criminal.  
That is the right thing to do._**  
  
He recalled how, many years ago he told Woo Hyun how he'd given up wanting to become a police officer. That he was disillusioned with how, the corruption in the department had affected him in having any more trust in the integrity of the police department. He remembered asking Woo Hyun if he would still continue to believe in his own aspirations to being a police officer.  
  
And it seemed; without his knowing, Woo Hyun had chosen to walk into a very dangerous path. While he were completely left unaware, as he went around on a rampage on the internet as Hades...  
  
 ** _But this one would be very difficult.  
From the beginning... it was wrong._**  
  
From the beginning, he misunderstood Woo Hyun. Woo Hyun knew too well how difficult it could be to bring Jo Hyeon Min to justice. He knew that Jo Hyeon Min's intentions to bring justice to the people that falsely accused his father was just a façade to exact revenge to Chairman Jo Kyung Shin. Even if it meant some innocent lives would be sacrificed.  
  
Woo Hyun had been doing it alone, while not letting himself get too close to people. Because he didn't know just how many spies Jo Hyeon Min had placed all around him.  
  
In order to protect the team members he held precious, Woo Hyun had distanced himself from getting too close to them. He kept his distance from everyone in order to not allow the enemy to get the upper hand. Well,  _almost_  everyone.  
  
It saddened him to think that Woo Hyun had been fighting the losing battle alone, while he had people helping and supporting him.  
  
 ** _Don't become like me._**  
 **Become a great cop.**  
  
His heart clenched as he heard that last sentence. He recalled the words he said to Kang Mi about carrying someone else's life on their shoulders. It seemed there was a need to remind himself of that fact.  
  
Park Ki Young glanced to his side and smiled. "Thank you... Yoo Kang Mi," he said, gratefully.  
  
If even Woo Hyun was telling him to continue on to become a great cop; a much better one than he had been, how could he deny his best friend from seeing that happening? If becoming a better cop—even while remaining as Woo Hyun—could make up for not being able to be there for his friend, perhaps it would not be so bad.  
  
For Woo Hyun, he'd try to live a lot longer than him. For Woo Hyun, he'd try to become an even better cop than either both of them could become. That would be the best offering he could give to his closest best friend.


End file.
